penpusher: (DemReps)
I know that a lot of elements involved in the realm of politics are confusing, arcane, even designed to be misunderstood by the general public. But can we at least get this one basic fact right:

An affiliate of a political party's actions vis a vis sexual misconduct is not a "partisan" issue. Just because a man has acted in a way that is sexually abusive toward someone else that action is, in no way, reflective of a political party.

There are enough examples on both sides of the aisle to support this concept. So, I hope that we can at least agree on that. We can run down the names if you want, but we can easily do that. And the point that needs making is these are just the things we know. There are abuses that have been buried for ten, twenty, thirty years that are just beginning to come to light. Assuredly, as with all the previous cases, those that have committed these acts will not all be from one political party.

But by making it into an accusatory element that somehow reflects on the politics of one party or the other does two negative things. First, it turns the issue into something that it is not. This isn't about being a Democrat or a Republican. This is a method of power and abuse that these men, not just in politics, but as we have seen, in Hollywood, in big business, in small business, in colleges and universities and even in high schools, have used to have their way with other people who have been in positions of weakness against someone who had an image of an upstanding citizen who achieved success for the general public.

But it also diminishes the issue that we need to examine, which is how our society permits men to act in ways that are more related to our caveman ancestors than to persons from a modern day society.

The "Boys with be boys" excuse still gets used and that not only allowed "boys" (aka adult men), to act in this way, it made women and girls feel there was nothing that could be done! This is just reality so you better just lie back and enjoy it.

And really, that was the system of control, tolerance, and method of oppression that occurred for centuries. Women were not seen as equals to men, so what they said, what they thought, how they acted, likewise were not treated equally.

Here's the issue that needs to be examined. Our society has helped to perpetrate this system. In many ways, it's like racism. The oppressed group is diminished, treated like an "other," is frequently assumed to have "participated" in some way which allowed this to happen, and is questioned as if they are the perpetrator, not the victim.

And the problem we see, when we have a system that functions like that is that more and more men will want to participate in it. It becomes an expectation, an opportunity, a right. I can do it because every man in every generation before me did it.

That brings me to the crucial element that we must keep in mind. And the problem is the same for sexism and racism if we want to actually dismantle these cruel aspects of our society.

We need to have closure for victims, and for that, at the very least, apologies should be forthcoming from those that have acted inappropriately, or criminally, no matter if the Statute of Limitations has expired (because, after all, the victims have lived with these actions all this while). But to make the changes in our society that need to happen to stop it, to close the door on this behavior in the future, requires us to dismantle the elements that have permitted it, and that is a different element.

In that sense, we have to look less at individual acts, specifically because this is a macro problem that needs to be resolved. It involves teaching small boys about how to behave, what is appropriate, why certain actions should never be done to someone else without asking. It's about teaching children that if you were physically abused by someone, you need to say so and that adults will believe you. We need to begin this immediately because the longer we wait, the more abusers can still be created.

Ultimately, there is a cultural issue here. These guys may not have been taught that they have permission to do what they did, but they learned it by osmosis, based on how our societal norms treated others who acted the same way. And that's where the main focus needs to be if we are to bring an end to these issues. In no way does this absolve anyone who did anything before, but the most important idea we need to collectively focus on is keeping it from happening again to anyone. That means all of us need to start changing our behaviors for the sake of all of us.
penpusher: (Pen)
It's all about how much power and control you have over your own life. That is a major determination in how self-assured you are, how fufilled you feel, ultimately, how happy you can potentially be.

Most people are not 100% in control of their own lives. In fact, only very few people are. These are people that sort of aren't the kind of people anyone would want to be: Mary-Kate and Ashley fr. instance. If you have a ton of money and no responsibility, you have the opportunity to make your life whatever you would like. That's where they are.

Most of us have to answer to some sort of superior: a boss, a parent, a spouse even.

But the people who are responsible for taking a portion of your life are also being burdened by the need to organize just how they're using you. That's why it's mostly people in the entertainment biz (or those that are "out" of the biz, really) that get all of the perks and free time while still staying in control.

What percentage of control do you have over your own life? What percentage control do you have over someone else's? I wonder if there's an equation that can tell us something about the whole concept of how this affects our well being and happiness quotient.

Then again, there's the issue of personality. What do we want in our lives? Some people aren't happy unless they're working constantly. Others would feel fulfilled if they got to continually travel. What control and happiness means to these two people are nothing at all alike.

This relates back to knowing yourself. If you don't really understand your own process, you'll be miserable and might not know it, or know how to correct it.

Some people prefer to be in charge of others. They are more fulfilled by bossing others. But there is a tradeoff. They have to deal with the consequences of their decisions for these people. Well, theoretically they do. They might just ignore the results and go on a vacation, not to point fingers or anything.

But we come into situations knowing that it's a bargain. We sacrifice some of the control of our lives to earn a living, or do something we want to do. That's the key. A bargain. We are constantly trading one thing for another: our time for a company's money... our money for items we need or want.

I can almost see the graph. On the X axis is the listing of how much money one earns. On the Y axis is the amount of freedom or free time one has. The idea is to stay on the diagonal line.

But how do we gain more control over our lives? What is it that is preventing us from getting to do more of what we want to do in this life?

Well... we're assuming we're all responsible people. So, that's part of it. Again, it's a method of figuring out personal priorities. What matters most? If you don't know, you'll never be able to figure it out.

There's the point of your situation. Did you build it yourself or walk into it? How much of it can you change right away? What things can you do to help make it more pleasant for you? The ultimate goal isn't productivity... or even success, but quality of experience. Imagine being the most YOU you could be! The ULTIMATE YOU. That's what the goal is. But unless you know what you need to become that, and unless you have some plan to get to that, it won't happen. There are too many people out to try to control your life, and they're probably getting some sort of boost to their own life by running yours.

Ultimately money is just a way of controlling the masses. Homeless people have all sorts of freedom to do any potential thing they might do, but they also have no money, so that's their issue. Money permits a lot of freedom. That's the power. That's the control.

Maybe if I figure out the equation, that meme would sweep through LJ like that "friends you met" quiz that blew its bandwidth last night!

Profile

penpusher: (Default)
penpusher

January 2023

S M T W T F S
1234567
891011121314
15161718192021
2223 2425262728
293031    

Syndicate

RSS Atom

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jul. 9th, 2025 01:23 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios